Motivational Article

When I was a new parent and my daughter was going through the “terrible twos”, I can remember feeling frustrated—often—that she didn't get the message I gave her several (hundred) times a day: “No, don't … (touch that, eat that, break that, hit, yell, throw toys…).” No matter how much I told her “No”, she continued with every behaviour toddlers engage in that I wanted to correct.

Finally the lightbulb went on: rather than giving her negative feedback all the time, I decided to try the opposite. So, instead of “Don't pull the dog's tail”, I said, “Pat the dog gently, like this. Good--that's it.” Instead of “Your making a mess with your food”, I said, “You ate all of your peaches! Hurray!”

Like magic, her behaviour transformed almost overnight! No longer was there any struggle. I responded to the positive things and she felt happy and eager to learn. Such is the tremendous power of acknowledgement.

Bravo!

“You did an excellent job on that-way to go.”

Doesn't it feel great when you hear that? To be acknowledged by others for our efforts—large and small—is affirming: we know that others value what we do and that knowledge propels us to continue to do our best.

We all need feedback, including the negative kind—getting clear signals that we are on the wrong track helps us make good decisions. If you turn the wrong way onto a one-way street, you may not notice until someone honks their horn at you.

But too much negative feedback is not helpful unless it is constructive. To be told “You're wrong” over and over, without understanding why or without knowing how to improve, eventually erodes our self-esteem. We feel inept and unworthy and reluctant to try anything new because we assume we will fail. We sit idle, going nowhere.

Just like a car cannot drive without fuel, a person's “drive” requires acknowledgement. We all need to hear, “Bravo!” once in awhile to keep the motor running.

Tip : If you start to acknowledge other people—genuinely showing appreciation for their efforts—they will start to notice and appreciate yours. Give someone a “Bravo!” in the next few minutes and watch what happens.

Yippee!

We all need acknowledgement from others, but we can't always rely on outside praise to motivate us—we also need to learn to acknowledge ourselves. One powerful way to acknowledge the results in your life is to really 'Yippee' them.

One of my former students committed himself fully to acknowledging himself. He was a young, very tall filmmaker, and used to jump high in the air and touch the ceiling screaming “Yippee!” The energy surrounding him was infectious.

After four weeks of practicing his Yippee, he received the money he'd been seeking for three years to create his first documentary.

A company I know uses a big Tibetan gong to make sure the whole building knows when an order is coming in. It creates excitement and enthusiasm in all departments. The message it gives to everyone is “Let's celebrate our hard work!”

Some people give “High Fives”; others whoop, “Yee Haw!” Maybe you like to do a happy dance? Maybe you are lower key and quietly affirm, “Good for me.” Discover your own Yippee and use it daily.

Tip : It needs to feel good and exciting. The more fun and energy you create, the stronger its effect will be on yourself and others.

Salute the Small Stuff!

As children, we acknowledge (and want to be acknowledged for) everything. “Watch me, Mom. Watch me again. Wasn't that a great dive? I'm doing better, aren't I? Watch me again!”

As we grow older and more sophisticated, we consciously acknowledge only major accomplishments: graduations, promotions, big projects. We take small events and results for granted.

We forget that our unconscious mind receives a positive charge from both minor and major accomplishments if they are experienced with the same intensity of Yippee.

You create results all day long. When consciously acknowledged, these results can impact your unconscious mind with the message, "I am a creator who manifests what I intend." Did you skip the cream in your coffee today? Did you make someone smile? Did you follow through on a promise to call someone?

Acknowledging the “trivial” things makes them special, exciting and magical. Do it for long enough and your life will become sparkled with grace and small miracles. The positive reinforcement will propel you forward toward creating major results more easily.

Make a list of 5 things you did well today (even if one of them is having driven to work without getting into an accident!) Celebrate each one with your Yippee.

Tip : The minute you feel the energy of your celebration, share it with someone else! Smile at the store clerk. Thank a colleague. Radiate the energy of acknowledgement and watch your world transform.